Toys Limited

Last summer, after we moved into our new home, I made a conscious decision to reduce the toys my three children have. Most were communal toys they all share but, I also helped my oldest to part with some of his personal toys he no longer played with. That was a bit of a struggle, he is a bit of a pack rat by nature, but my logic and reason won him over for that moment. The younger ones didn't even notice what I purged from their stashes.

Once I purged all broken, unloved, age inappropriate toys and books, I then took some time to figure out a better way to store them. One I don't mind looking at every day. This ended up being a trio of antique wooden boxes my mom had and was not using. I stacked them on their sides and they are used like cubbies or shelves. This unit is for our everyday toys, books, and puzzles.

Then... I made 3 capsules of toys. I decided to make them themed and group like toys with each other. I am now rethinking this method. I have been toying with the idea of making capsules of a variety of different toys/puzzles/etc to almost completely swap out our everyday toys, not add to them as I had been doing. Even that makes too many toys accessible. I know this because the three year old was just dumping all the toys out and not playing. I removed the capsule and changed a few everyday ones out and that fixed the problem.

I also try to limit the kind of toys the kiddos own. I don't mind if they play with trendy toys run on batteries at someone else's home, just leave it there when they are through! I know what they enjoy and what helps then develop and grow. I also know we have enough noise without battery operated ridiculousness. So, I like to stick with the classics. Puzzles (big floor ones are amazing!), legos, doll house, building blocks, Lincoln Logs, chalk board/doodle board and trains. We also love Dr. Seuss and Berenstain Bears books and many others.

Why? Well... kids with Autism usually lack the natural skill of imaginative play. If you give them a toy that simply stimulates them, they will just sit there and be stimulated. Instead, something like Lincoln Logs requires imagination, problem solving, fine motor and some fundemental mathematical skills. Insisting that a child with Autism will only play on an iPad and be satisfied is simply not true. My kids love them some iPad time at their Mimi's house BUT, it is a treat. At home, they really play. Just like I did as a kid and my parents before me. In the summer they play outside with water and sand and sticks or just roll down the hill over and over. In the winter they make snowmen, slide for hours or just shovel off the porch for fun. Autism should not be an excuse for lack of diverse play.

Before you go hating me, let me say this. I am not blindly stating this based on one kid. I have THREE who all have an Autism diagnosis after extensive tests. And, this works. Less toys leaves less visual distractions and less screen time forces them to develop their imaginative play skills. You may need to help them at first by modeling how, but they will start to figure it out. Some days they will just want to line things up, build only exact replicas of the blocks box pictured castle (my oldest was a pro at that) or put the same puzzle together 8 times before lunch. That is ok! It is still getting them familiar with real play and that is a win.

Is this transition hard? Yup. I have tried cold turkey and I have tried slowly phasing out and both can be effective depending on what is being removed. That is totally subjective to your child and your personality. But, at the end of the day, change is hard. And, it's worth it. I have had to explain to my family many times why I have chosen a minimalist life for myself and the kids. It all comes back to it feels right. The kid happier, healthier and developing because of it.